I have come to the realization that I am a ghost haunting my children. There is an overwhelming amount of evidence to support this claim, and that is what I intend to do. I think that you will find that you are also a ghost.
1. My children often speak to me in general but cannot hear my replies, or,when I speak to them, they can't hear me at all. I used to think that they were just ignoring me but now I think there is a semi-penetrable veil of time and space between us and they occasionally get glimpses of me or hear my voice from a far.
2. I often have to resort to making electronic devices disappear or not work at all, and, in extreme occasions, stomp around or slam doors, to get my point across or to get them to pay attention. I realize that this is kind of a hack-y ghost trick-used in all of the movies, but sometimes it's all I've got!
3. I occasionally turn up in pictures or video when not expected. I'll be getting dressed or doing dishes or some other task and-boom- there I am! I'm always a little shocked when I'm captured on film, so I must be some sort of mythical creature.
4. Apparently I am a magical "finding" ghost since I'm the only being in the house who can find "ANYTHING." When I am summoned with the words "Mommy, I can't find ________" I appear where I am needed, and TA-DAAAAA! I find the socks, or toy, or whatever.
5. I can do things all day long, a multitude of tasks, and the only thing that they notice is that I've moved something. Suddenly it's a catastrophe- "Where is RAINBOW DASH???" I hear. I spring into action. I've been summoned!
Being a ghost can be difficult and challenging but I think you'll find that haunting your family can be quite rewarding. If you haunt them long enough and do a satisfactory job, I'm told that you can even turn into a real person some day-some time after they turn 18.
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