Mom Jeans! I can barely think the words without serious pain coursing through my body. Yet, here I sit, realizing that I now know the reason that Mom Jeans are so prevalent.
- After you have children, your body is forever changed. That is the truth. Especially if you have had a c-section and didn't have the luxury of getting a tummy tuck at the same time! When you have a c-section, the doctor basically cuts through any remaining abdominal muscles you may have, rummages around inside your uterus and pulls out a baby. Now you have your miracle but you also have a numb stomach for the rest of your life! A little extra, by the way, is that if you are not super skinny you end up with a neat little flap of skin that never really fits right with any clothing. If you don't have a c-section and you lose the baby weight you end up with loose, crepe-y skin over your stomach. After I had my girls I lived in my post-op girdle because I felt like I had a waist line again!
- Jeans make you choose: show your crack or be comfortable. I suppose that this could go with the section above but what the heck. It looks better to have points of interest. I have one pair of jeans that fit well (they are a boot cut, low rise jean that are so comfortable) but they are too big in the waist/hips so whenever I am on the floor i.e. most of the day between playing and cleaning up, my pants are down well below the crack. I have a few tricks such as long sweaters, long shirts, scooting back against the wall, etc. but eventually I end the fight. I can't spend all day covering my "line" as Olivia says (as in, "Mommy, I see your line!") Mom jeans would end this problem by covering that area and sitting snugly around my waist. My other jeans are a slightly higher rise and fit better in the waist/hips but are really snug around the thighs. That is not a comfortable situation but I tend to wear those if we're going for a play date or someone's coming over here so that not all of my assets are exposed.
- Boobs + Low Rise Jeans +Belly Flab = constant shirt adjustment. Need I say more? I think all the ladies with D cups or above understand what I'm talking about. It's a bad scene. Add a v-neck shirt to the equation and you are constantly pulling the bottom of your shirt down and the top up.
So, will I switch to mom jeans? Not on your life. Until I find a pair of jeans that will stay put and still look good I will just continue to struggle with the issue of plumber's crack. Hey, here's an idea. It is said that if you name a problem you take power over it. What say you we rename Plumber's Crack to "Mom's Crevasse," or something similar? Name it and claim it!
